Because your steadfast love is better than life,
my lips will praise you.
So I will bless you as long as I live
Psalm 63

Lord, help us to believe this.
In times of deepest doubt and sadness
Let us beleive that your steadfast love
is better than life,
help our lips to praise your name.
When we are more aware of our suffering than our salvation
Help us to fix our eyes on calvary .

Please pray that Ian would speak to us soon.

Sore Throat

Ian is still struggling with a sore throat from the thrush. When his throat is sore, he shuts down a lot. He barely communicated with any of us today. Please pray that it would go away. Remember how much we prayed for his eyes? All the infections that he fought through and all of the medications and eye patches? The doctor told us last week that his eyes are perfect. The Lord can completely heal his throat too. Please keep praying.

Wondrous are His Works

Sometimes I forget the awesome, wondrous, breathtaking, things that the Lord has done for Ian. Psalm 111 freshly reminded me that God has done great things:

Psalm 111:2-4, 7

"Great are the works of the Lord,
studied by all who delight in them.
Full of splendor and majesty is his work,
and his righteousness endures forever.
He has caused his wondrous works to be remembered;
the Lord is gracious and merciful...
The works of his hands are faithful and just..."

God's saving Ian's life last September is an awesome work! No less majestic that his work at the Red Sea, no less glorious than his raising of Lazarus from the dead. Ian should have died on impact, there's no reason he should have lived. But he survived the crash. "Great are the works of the Lord". Ian should have died on the life-flight to Pittsburgh. But God kept his heart beating, his lungs breathing. "Full of splendor and majesty is His work". Ian should have died in the ICU. His brain was dying, the doctors told us that brain death was imminent, the funeral home had been called. But overnight, things changed, brain death was no longer imminent, he'd "somehow" made it over the hump. Ian should be dead, there's no question about that. But God saved him. "He has caused his wondrous works to be remembered; the Lord is gracious and merciful..."

So often I forget these majestic works of the Lord, full of splendor, that I have seen with my own eyes. Sometimes I forget that Ian should have died, that death was coming upon him like the Egyptians came upon the Israelites at the Red Sea. And when I forget the awesome deeds that the Lord has worked on Ian's behalf, I despair. Why, because if it wasn't God who saved Ian, then there's no reason to think that God will continue the good work he began. If Ian just happened to live, than our only hope for the future is the chance that Ian might just happen to fully recover.

Oh, the hope that remembering the works of the Lord brings! I love how Charles Spurgeon puts it:


"I like to think of every blessing of grace that I have recieved as coming from God because each mercy then becomes prophetic of more. God is unchangeable, and therefore what He has given He will give again. The stream that has begun to flow will never cease flowing. The more the Lord gives, the more we may expect. Each mercy as it comes makes room for another larger than itself, even as the narrow end of the wedge opens the way for its wider portion. John Bunyan said that God's flowers bloom double: not only do they bloom double, but they bloom sevenfold. Therefore be encouraged. The least of the things that are freely given to us by God draws behind it an endless chain of more than golden links of love."

God has done awesome deeds on Ian's behalf, things are full of splendor and majesty on Ian's behalf. And these past deeds are only the light along the horizon of the coming dawn.


-David

The week in review

A lot seems to have happened this week. Each therapist that has come in has seen improvement and is encouraged. Here's just a sampling:

- Taking an object from someone's hand now seems to be an old skill.

- He's learning to help us as we care for him by moving forward or backward or moving limbs, etc. He seems to work well with the therapists who ask him to cooperate.

- He takes small portions of food (e.g. pudding, Brenda's applesauce, baby food fruit, etc.) by a spoon.

- He visited an eye doctor who told us there is nothing wrong with his eyes at all. In fact, his prescription for glasses is about the same as it was before the accident, and there's no evidence of any problems. How many times did we ask for prayer for his troubled eyes?!?

- He blinks 'yes' with regularity now. He often nods his affirmation and shakes his head 'no'.

- He doesn't seem to be complaining about his throat being sore anymore. I'm not sure if that means it's gone or if it means he's not telling us.

Please continue to pray that he would talk to us....

Steve

Whatever My God Ordains

Whatever my God ordains is right
In His love I am abiding
I will be still in all He does
And follow where He is guiding
He is my God, though dark my road
He holds me that I shall not fall
And so to Him I leave it all

Whatever my God ordains is right
He never will deceive me
He leads me by the proper path
I know He will not leave me
I take content, what He has sent
His hand can turn my griefs away
And patiently I wait His day

Whatever my God ordains is right
Here shall my stand be taken
Though sorrow, or need, or death be mine
Yet I am not forsaken
My Father’s care circles me there
He holds me that I shall not fall
And so to Him I leave it all

Whatever my God ordains is right
Though now this cup in drinking
Bitter it seems to my faint heart
I take it all unshrinking
My God is true, each morn anew
Sweet comfort yet shall fill my heart
And pain and sorrow shall depart

Original words by Samuel Rodigast, 1676
Translated by Catherine Winkworth, 1863
Alternate words by Mark Altrogge

"...For God has not destined us for wrath, but to obtain salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ, who died for us so that whether we are awake or asleep we might live with him. Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing." (1 Thessalonians 5:9-11)

A call for faith and endurance

In Revelation 13, sandwiched in between the images of two beasts who were "allowed to make war on the saints and to conquer them" is a passage that caught my attention:

"If anyone is to be taken captive, to captivity he goes; if anyone is to be slain with the sword, with the sword must he be slain. Here is a call for the endurance and faith of the saints."

I forget there's a spiritual war going on. I forget that there are spiritual beasts (e.g. our culture's very unspiritual perspective on life, the enticements of things and pleasures, the pursuit of happiness in anything but God, etc.) who try to subdue and remove altogether my confidence in God and his promise of heaven. I forget that in this war some are taken captive by those beasts, and some even die.

Until Ian's car accident, I "forgot" that Christians suffer loss and heartache, too, and that Jesus told us we would have trouble in this life. Loss and heartache, like the captivity and death from the spiritual conflict, also "call for the endurance and faith of the saints." Thank God for His gracious power to endure and to trust Him. I couldn't do this on my own. Lord, help Ian to hear the call for endurance and faith and to trust your gracious work in his life.

Ian continues to take very small steps. He's been re-learning how to reach away from his body, and he does well at it. He's also doing well sitting up on his own (still with help from us).

Thank you for praying.
Steve

Dating Ian

1 Corinthians 13, verses four through eight are highlighted in Ian's Bible. "Love is patient and kind, love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not made irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends."

I sometimes wonder what Ian and I look like from the outside. What do people think when we are out on dates? Do they know that we're dating or do they just think that I'm a sister or a friend? For people that do know us, does it seem strange to them that I'm pushing my boyfriend in a wheelchair and talking to him even though he can't talk back to me? People often tell me that any other girl would leave in a situation like this. From the outside, it probably looks as though this relationship is all one-sided right now. Our relationship doesn't look or seem normal because we can't do things that "normal" couples do. I would've thought the same thing before the accident and still do in times of doubt.

But so far I haven't found anything in the Bible that says that our relationship is abnormal or that tells me that I should've walked away. What the Bible does say is that love bears and endures all things. God has given Ian and I love and I am so thankful for it. This is what a relationship looks like to Ian and to me- we are simply God's instruments and He chose to use us in each other's lives in this way. This is the story that God has given us, complete with wheelchairs and therapists. If His will includes it, Ian and I will continue to endure all things together with the love that God has given us. Maybe someday Ian can plan special dates again but either way, I'm just happy to have him in my life.

We love because He first loved us.

Larissa

I waited patiently for the Lord.

Psalm 40:1

Hello?

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,

Let this blest assurance control,

That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,

And hath shed His own blood for my soul.

It is well, with my soul,

It is well, with my soul,

It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Last night, Bill, one of Ian's attendant care workers, held his cell phone in his open hand and invited Ian to take it. He did. Ian reached up and took the cell phone. Then, Bill asked him to put it back into his open hand. He did. Pray for Ian's continued healing.

Steve

Thoughts

"In your times of severe distress, which are you more aware of- your suffering or your salvation?"

What a convicting but great thing for me to have read recently. For the past few days, I have been so busy looking at myself and this situation that, though I don't want to admit it, I have quite forgotten all that was accomplished for me at the cross. And it is a path of thoughts that leads to nothing, is not satisfying at all, and only leads to more discouragement. I want to fix my eyes on the cross and all that was accomplished for me there. That is where my hope and joy are found, in the eternal, not the temporary.

Ian needs to fix his eyes on the cross as well and he needs grace to do that. He recently told me that he is weary- whether he meant physically or spiritually I don't know. He has had some very challengings days, fighting a sore throat and lots of stomach aches and headaches. If his gaze is not fixed on the cross, there is much to be discouraged about.

Only the Lord can encourage Ian to keep fighting through this. Please pray that Ian would be strengthened to keep wanting to work to come back to us. Pray that God would take away all of his discomforts. Pray that we would talk to him soon.

Larissa

Endurance and Patience

"May you be strengthened with all power, according to his glorious might, for all endurance and patience with joy..." (Col 1:11).

Strengthened for endurance and patience with joy. If there's anyone I know who would need a prayer for endurance and joyful patience, it's my brother. I was reading this scripture for the two of us, and he indicated that he wanted me to pray this scripture for him. Ian's situation seems harder than any of ours. He has some of the most difficult challenges facing him. It's hard to see a brother (or boyfriend or son or friend) in his situation, but it must be harder to be the one in his position.

Recently, a friend of ours strongly encouraged Ian never to give up. Lets never give up praying for his strength - physical or spiritual strength.

Thanks,
-Ben

Riveted

We had a private screening last night of the latest unedited movie created by Ian and David. The filming for the movie was completed about two years ago; Ian was the main character. Ian was in front of the TV while we played it, and I had a perfect view of his face the whole time. His eyes were wide open, and he was riveted. He even made some noise with his voice. That experience with Ian is very unique, and it was encouraging to see it. I have no idea what to conclude about it, but we were encouraged.

Please pray for a breakthrough. Thank you.

Steve

Leaning

With his feet on the floor, Ian was able to lean forward (as most of us might sit) in his wheelchair and hold himself there of his own accord. Small steps...

Steve

Praise to the Lord, who doth prosper thy work and defend thee

Who from the heavens the streams of His mercy doth send thee

Ponder anew what the Almighty can do

Who with His love doth befriend thee.

Ian was awake the entire day yesterday until about 11 at night. He watched Emergence with David, a movie that they made together a few years ago. He was really engaged and at one point used his voice for David. Today he was a little bit sleepier but it's understandable considering how awake he was yesterday. He is working so hard at learning to balance himself when he sits up. He gets a really determined look in his eyes and it's so obvious that he's just figuring it all out.

He indiciated to Amanda today that he still has a sore throat. Please pray that God would heal it.

Ponder anew, what the Almighty can do.

Larissa

Heaven motivates me

In so many of my conversations with people lately, I invariably end up bending their ears about heaven, a topic I can't seem to get away from since Ian's accident. A friend recently asked me a question like, "How does anticipating heaven motivate you in daily tasks like getting up in the morning and going to work?" I gave an answer, but I've also thought about it a lot more since he asked me. It's a great question, since every morning I wake up with a set of tasks ahead of me.

An experience like this with Ian puts the rest of life into perspective. Things and relationships and a career and so many other things have so much less significance next to someone's life. Compared to heaven, though, life itself pales. Heaven motivates me to hold all those other things loosely, because they pale in comparison to heaven's joy. Heaven motivates me to more frequently consider my daily tasks as something the Lord has given me to do while on this earth even if that task is as mundane as taking out the garbage. Heaven motivates me to recognize that, though grief and sadness stalk me now, they will be replaced by a joy I can't even understand.

Ian continues to make slow progress. He was reaching for objects at the request of one therapist. When asked to focus on one of two objects, he complied. When we help him, he's able to get to a point where he's sitting up on his own. He's awake and alert during the day more than he's ever been. Everyone who works with him reports small steps of progress. It's hard to tell, but it seems that Ian's throat is feeling better, too.

Thank you for praying.

Steve

Before the throne of God above
I have a strong and perfect plea
A great High Priest whose name is love
Who ever lives and pleads for me


Singing this at Care Group tonight, I was reminded that this is still true of Ian. Jesus still lives and pleads for Ian. Jesus still loves Ian with a love that we cannot even comprehend. Not a day goes by that God does not supply Ian with all the grace that he needs. Every day of this trial has been ordained by God and it will not last one day longer than it should.


Ian has been awake for longer periods of time than we've ever noticed. He's pretty much awake all day now without many naps. He was very awake tonight too and made it through most of Care Group. He also did a great job sitting up tonight and is working so hard to learn how to keep himself balanced. I don't know how he does it- God must be giving him so much strength to keep fighting to do absolutely everything.


Please pray that Ian would be reminded of all of God's faithfulness and goodness to Him in the past in a way that encourages him for his future.


Thank you for praying


Larissa

Memories

Ian has shared an annual vacation with the same set of cousins and uncles and aunts and grandparents since he was 6 months old. It was always one of the highlights of his summer. Over the last 10 years we've visited the same lake maybe 8 times, and we've vacationed at one particular house for about 6-7 (this year included). Our thinking in taking him on vacation again was to help him hopefully latch onto those old memories. I went early to set the house up for him; I built a temporary ramp for the front of the house among other things. Ian arrived on Friday and left on Monday with Mary.

I think it he enjoyed it. He seemed to enjoy being down on the dock near the water. I think he enjoyed seeing all of his cousins again. I think he did remember some things.

It must be frustrating, though, not to be able to tell us what he's thinking. We keep praying that he could communicate with us. Join us....

Steve

Vacation

This picture is vacation last year. A picture this year would be pretty different.

Ian loves vacation. Especially last year, he worked so hard during the summer and all that he talked about was how he couldn't wait to get to vacation. He could sleep as late as he wanted to and spend his days on the boat or laying on the dock. It is something he has done every year for 22 years. It's the reunion with his cousins who are basically his sisters. Vacation is the epitome of summer to Ian and all of his family that goes each year.

So we're off tomorrow morning for Lake Anna. We're really not sure what to expect. Steve and the boys and the rest of the family are there now getting the house ready for Ian- building ramps and all. Please pray for wisdom for Steve and Mary as they care for Ian this weekend. Pray that Ian would do well and that this trip would bring so many memories back into his life. Pray that we would all be rejoicing that he is alive and well.

The blog will be quiet for a few days.
Thank you for praying.
Larissa