Jan 5, 2012

steps


research alternative therapies. make him more independent in his eating. find more things for him to do during the day. work on recall. remind him of the date. the things that race through my mind, often filling me with guilt, that i'm not doing more, not taking on more, for ian. i know i can only do so much in a day on my own, but couldn't i fit in a few more? therapists and doctors would say, have said, that i can and should. am i giving ian the best chance to get better or have i become complacent in his condition now? what more can i be doing, should be doing. not new thoughts or guilts, but ongoing, nagging. they aren't all wrong - as ian's wife, primary caregiver and advocate, these are my responsibilities. but there are priorities. like reading god's word together. having times of rest. dates. 

and so when i get glimpses that maybe i am helping him and that maybe i am doing something right, it is beautiful. last night as we walked from the bedroom to the kitchen table, caleb under his left arm and me moving his bad leg forward, it struck me. he didn't need a prompt to keep his legs moving. he didn't need me to tell him how to walk. he used to, but not now. he was taking steps. leaning on his brother, he was taking steps on his own accord. and even his bad leg was doing more. he was walking fast, and strong. what a beautiful reprieve - something is changing and something that we are doing is working.

thank you for your prayers.

7 comments:

E said...

Congratulations on the walking! Thank You, Father. So grateful for what He is doing.

E said...

Congratulations! Thank You, Father.

Sandi said...

Amazing Larissa, You are so to be admired for being the kind of wife God wants us all to be. Your priorities are in the right place, your love and dedication to Ian are such a testimony. "Leaning on his brother," how Jesus must be smiling down on that whole situation. Thanks for continuing your posts. Unending prayers, Sandi

Anonymous said...

Thank you once again for being real...for sharing...for pressing on and for crying out to Jesus for help.
I thank God for your example in so many ways.
One step at a time; in His time.
Praying still-
Wendy in MD

Anonymous said...

Clap-clap-clap-clap-clap!
Bravo!
Cheers and whoo-hoo!
Congrats on the progress!
Thank You, Lord!

Still praying.

Mary Ann K.

Maria said...

We love you both so very, very much! We just keep praying and praying - it's such a privilege to see God working in you both... Congratulations!! So thankful...

Bethany said...

Praying God frees you from that sense of nagging guilt, something I can so relate to.
Eric preached a sermon last year on Christ's rest. His illustration on not being a load-bearing wall may encourage you. I think it's still on the Sovereign Grace Cleveland website. If not, check Akron's or Pittsburgh's because he gave it there too.
Rejoicing in God's comfort to you through Ian's walking better.