she came to visit us, our life photographer, on a warm summer day to take photos to be on the inside flap of a book that was being scripted each evening after dinner.
that day was the first time he could do this,
stand next to me, with just my hand helping him, not with my arm around him, like we needed to in all of the photos from this day
where my arm was hidden around his back, helping him, balancing him, and we couldn't stand and simply hold hands.
this summer came to ian in strength, upgrading to a walker, and then a cane and committing to walking by year 30. he left the house without a wheelchair for the first time and he walked out the front doors of his mom's house for the first time.
2013 was a big year.
yet, on a day that becomes reflective for so many of us, that's not what i most see.
what i most see is a hard-fought year, with fears and exposure and costs and crying and days sitting in front of a blank computer screen wondering why we signed a contract- that were all swallowed up by what was following us. by what was behind us and before us.
it was a year swallowed up in God.
it was a year that He swallowed us up, taking our inadequacies that were asked to put our story into 75,000 words, our legs that were asked to learn to walk again, our hearts that at times wanted out.
He followed us with mercy, and made our hopeless mornings and our sweet, quiet date nights and our laughter at his inappropriate jokes into beautiful life canvases.
He followed us with His goodness, keeping us, with his white-knuckle grip.
He blessed us, with two new nieces and nephews, bring number seven and eight into our hearts that four years ago didn't know that type of love.
He kept us, in each other, faithful and honorable to our covenant.
And all that we were given in Him will continue to be, so that this coming year that looms with exposure as our feebly written pages will be carried home in shopping bags and delivered with the mailman won't be faced apart from mercy. Or Himself. Or joy, in the most unexpected places.
He will follow us, and someday, someday hopefully soon, we will dwell in His house, forever.