May 16, 2013

to myself, a reminder


this is for myself, a reminder for when the next day comes that was like the last. a reminder on the next day that i don't know how to enjoy with a brain injury and the day that the things he used to do are all that i see. this is a reminder for the next time my mind has my bags packed and i wonder how i will keep loving.

there is someone who has already swallowed up my marriage and someone who has already swallowed up my loss. it has been finished and so i can wait with my husband, tearfully, and know that my way has already been made for me. i can wake in the morning with mercies that don't seem new and know that this has already been done for me.

it was done before i was born. done before i knew him. before mrs. murphy.

i can keep making my way in hope because He has made me His own.

i can know that this has nothing to do with me. but instead, Him.

22 comments:

riamariposa said...

Have you seen this, Larissa?

www.hopeheals.com/shortfilm

riamariposa said...

God is so glorified in yours and Ian's lives :) Thank you for your honest and vulnerability on this blog. Will be praying for a rejuvenated spirit.

Anonymous said...

Life is hard. God is good.
Still praying.
Wendy in MD

Bea said...

Your story is amazing. Blessings to you and may your day be filled with goodness. Happy Friday.

Bea said...

Your story is amazing. Blessings to you and your marriage. May your day be filled with goodness. Happy Friday.

auntie terry said...

amen and amen.

Anonymous said...

Amen!
It really is out of our hands isn't it? I'm amazed how I'm always led to your posts when I'm feeling much the same way. Thank you for sharing your feelings. What an inspiration.

God bless you sweet heart -- you and Ian. Have a joyful weekend!

emily o. said...

This is so beautiful. Amen.

Ollie said...

You are both an amazing witness and testimony to God's love and grace, and I thank you for your encouragement. Will keep you in my prayers x

Anonymous said...

As my pastor says:

It's always about Jesus.
It's only about Jesus.
It's ever about Jesus.

Blessings to you and your marriage.

Leslie Dawn said...

praying♥

Christine said...

The words at first paint a picture of pain, and then the colors and mood change, speaking of God's grace.

My son is ADHD and OCD and often those messed up brain chemicals make life a chore. Then, right about when I don't know how I'll cope, God shows up with the message you speak of here.

Beautiful, and praying that His grace showers you both today.

Anonymous said...

Be strong Larissa! You can do it, praying for you!!

Katy said...

Beautifully written and expressed. You couldn't be more right...it's all about Him. Beautiful, glorious, merciful, patient, omniscient Him. Have you ever heard the song "Passionate, Beautiful" by Kate Hurley? It may be on youtube. I hope you will look it up sometime. Our savior is truly passionate and beautiful. Greater than all our hardships! :)

Anonymous said...

L. , All I can say is: AMEN!! You are wise beyond your years. God has blessed you both. Rene

Karen said...

I cannot tell you what an encouragement you are to me as I struggle with new health difficulties every day. Today, hearing words that could change my life forever. Nothing deadly, just catastrophic to my way of life. And you point me back to Christ. Every time.Every time I forget. And you remind me again.

Thank you. Praying for you and Ian so often..

Chocalatta said...

you are beautiful...thanks for being a channel for the Spirit.

Lydia said...

Dear Larissa,
May God give you strength and joy to press on!

Here is my recent post about wanting to escape my trials, if it is any help:
http://mebanepilgrim.blogspot.com/2013/05/escaping-responsibility.html

Jesus is enough. Cling to Him!

Cyn said...

Yes He is enough. I enjoy reading your blog. How real you are. God Bless you and your hubby.

Anonymous said...

I needed to read this today, Larissa. Thank you for being so honest. Thank you for the beautiful answer you give to get through it.

-Jeri

http://sweetaftermath.blogspot.com/2013/06/crash-landing-in-holland.html

Amber said...

This is absolutely beautiful and profound.

Anonymous said...

I am so inspired by you and Ian. I have passed your blog and story on to my four small group gals. Now you have five more ladies praying for you both. This excerpt was especially beautiful. Thank you for sharing your lives.