today is a writing day, a coffee shop and itunes my company. i came across this portion that i've written and thought about how truly quickly ian's definition to the world changed. where i end though is on hope - hope that this is not all that Ian will know.
"With my eyes closed and the song ending, I felt a hand on my shoulder and a whisper in my left ear.
'Steve just called,' Mary said. 'Ian’s been in an accident. He’s in a Pittsburgh hospital. We need to leave.'
With those words, life shifted. With those words, my role in Mary’s life, in Ian’s life, in my family, warped. With those words, Ian was removed from a body that the world would call normal and was given a new label, a label what would change everything.
I would give anything to take those words back, those breaths back, to shove them up into a tight ball, seal them with tape and glue and cement to make sure that they never opened back up. Those words Mary told me and that moment and that millisecond in his car that he was distracted meant that for the rest of our lives, we would grieve. They meant that Ian would be lost."