God is our Refuge

The man declares, I am weary, O God;
I am weary, O God, and worn out.

Surely I am too stupid to be a man.
I have not the understanding of a man.

I have not learned wisdom,
nor have I knowledge of the Holy One.

Who has ascended to heaven and come down?
Who has gathered the wind in his fists?
Who has wrapped up the waters in a garment?
Who has established all the ends of the earth?
What is his name, and what is his son’s name?
Surely you know!

Every word of God proves true;
he is a shield to those who take refuge in him.

Proverbs 30:1-5

We should take refuge in Him because of this! When we are weary we can trust in the God who has ascended into heaven and come down, who has gathered the wind in His fists, who has wrapped up the waters in a garment, who has established all the end of the earth. This is an amazing God, surely He can be our refuge!

My Faithful God

Those three seemingly simple words were in one of the songs that we sang at Resolved tonight, our church's campus ministry. My Faithful God. If only I could believe that in just half of my thoughts throughout the day. Before this trial, I could've said those three words light-heartedly. Now instead I need to shout them in my mind because I so badly need to believe them.

God has proven his faithfulness to us again and again. But I have not yet found the way on my own to keep my mind focused on his faithfulness in my past instead of looking only at the trials of today. This is where I need grace. This is where Ian needs grace.

Please consider fasting with us on Wednesday. Specific prayer is that Ian would be able to communicate to us with his blinking. The therapists at the hospital are having trouble with his consistency in communicating with them. We're not sure if this is because of his mood or because he hasn't built up trust with them yet or really what it is. Pray that God would help him to communicate clearly.

As always, thank you for praying for ian.

Laris

How is this good?

I don't know. I may never know in this life how our very difficult experiences with Ian are good when I think about the way that we typically define "good". I realized recently how much we define how "good" an experience is by how pleasurable it is for us. Or, we define good by the benefit it provides us like a nasty tasting cough medicine that, despite its taste, quiets the cough almost instantly. We sometimes even define it more altruistically and say to ourselves, "well, if what we're going through is good for others...I guess I can endure and be the heroic sacrificial lamb." We just can't help defining that word without ourselves as the central focus, but "good" is shallow defined that way. These trials aren't good in those ways. They're not pleasurable, and I really don't see clearly how they're good for us (though I'm sure ultimately eternity's light will help me see them that way).

But, again, I'm reminded that these trials are not about us.

Scripture says, "You are good and do good" (Ps 119:68). I have to stare at this verse and in faith acknowledge that not only is God good, but he DOES good. Somehow, some way, therefore, these trials are good. But not in the way we typically define the word. Peter's words in 1 Peter 1:6-7 are like guard rails on a dark path guiding me through dark trials: "you have been grieved by various trials, so that the tested genuineness of your faith — more precious than gold that perishes though it is tested by fire — may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ." I'm grieved by these trials. They're certainly testing my faith in God which I know is genuine. The revealing of the genuineness of my faith results in praise and glory and honor to God. That's good. That's very, very good.

Pray for Ian.

Steve
(with some of Larissa's edits too:)

p.s. from larissa- Ian clearly indicated to me tonight that he is sad. He also responded when I asked him if he wanted life to be normal again. Please pray that God would encourage him......

This Week

Ian had some of his best sessions of sitting up this week. He is obviously getting much stronger and is working so hard to figure out how to balance himself again. A few times that he was sitting up he was using his voice at the same time. I was encouraging to keep talking to us, even if it doesn't seem to make sense. We had good reports from the therapy at the hospital as well.

So will Ian ever come back? I don't know. I don't know God's will. But I am encouraged that Ian has had no set-backs, only progress. I will not put my hope in that, but God continues to answer our prayers and continues to be kind to us.

Thank you for praying

Larissa

A Prayer

Teach me, O LORD, to follow your decrees;
then I will keep them to the end.

Give me understanding, and I will keep your law
and obey it with all my heart.



Direct me in the path of your commands,
for there I find delight.

Turn my heart toward your statutes
and not toward selfish gain.

Turn my eyes away from worthless things;
preserve my life according to your word.



Fulfill your promise to your servant,
so that you may be feared.

Take away the disgrace I dread,
for your laws are good.

How I long for your precepts!
Preserve my life in your righteousness.

Psalm 119:33-40

A Perfect Score

Ian was with a speech therapist today. They had him using a "board" we've used here at home to help him communicate with us. On the board are two choices that are potential answers to a question - one is correct and the other is not. He's given a wooden spoon or some other pointing device, and he has to choose the answer to a question. When we first reported that he could do this, he was getting the answers right 70% of the time. Today, he got a perfect score! The speech therapist was very excited about his progress.

Steve

Thumb wrestlimg

Larissa's parents were in for a visit this weekend. Ian was thumb wrestling with her mom. How can he do stuff like that (something he might have done prior to the wreck), but he can't talk to us? The brain is a mysterious thing. "I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made" (Ps 139:14).

Ian has been pretty sleepy this week. It might be from outpatient therapy, but really there's no way to tell what's causing it. He had a great session of sitting up last night- it was probably his best one yet. He's getting much stronger and is able to hold himself up for longer amounts of time. Tonight his back was hurting and didn't want to sit up. He tends to have back aches a lot so that is a good point of prayer.

We're so blessed to have had such warm weather this fall because it means we can spend a lot of time out on the patio with Ian. It will be really weird when it's too cold, because we've literally been out there every day with him since he came home.

Thank you, as always, for praying for Ian. Please pray that he would not have back pain. Pray that he would continue to communicate with us. Pray that the Lord would give him endurance and that he would return to us soon.

"Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,
Still be my vision, O ruler of all."

Larissa

You have only to be silent

This is one of the photos that hangs in our house; it's Caleb, Ben, and Ian.


I was struck recently by a phrase in Exodus 14. The people of Israel were backed up against the sea with the Egyptian army pursuing them. They were afraid, and they were accusing Moses of leading them out into the desert to die. Moses responded with a specific promise that the Egyptians would be overthrown, but what struck me was what he said after that. He told them that the Lord would fight for them. He told them, "you have only to be silent." What a posture of trust God required of them! They had no where to run from an army that, from their perspective, was about to slaughter them, and they were simply to stay put and be quiet. It seems, though, that the Lord would require a similar posture of every believer no matter what their situation. We may not be required to stay put but to move forward. Both require the same posture, though. What a challenge to me in this situation with Ian. I have only to be silent and wait for the Lord. Help me, Lord.

Ian continues to surprise us with the things that he's able to do. Today, Heather asked him to lift his knees to his chest while he laid on his back. She had a strap around his knees to help him, but when she asked him to do it he did. They did that a few times. Small steps.

Thank you for your prayers.

Steve

"but God shows his love for us in that
while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8).

When we were still rebelling against him, God the Father implemented his plan to save us. It was to send God the Son, Jesus, to earth. There, he would live the life that we should have lived, and then die the death that we were unkowingly headed towards.
Jesus gladly gave himself to this plan to save us.

"Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." (Hebrews 12:2)

Today, Ian, Lydia, Larissa, and my mom went to Reeger's Farm, one of Indiana's favorite Autumn activities. This picture is of when Ian, Larissa, and some friends went to Reeger's two years ago.

-Ben

Ian continues to gain strength in his ability to sit up and hold himself there. He's been using a bar in front of him to hold onto and balance himself. It's incredible to see the progress that he's made since he came home from the hospital.

So when is this going to end for Ian? That's all I want to know and I feel like that's all that I'm waiting for. We're still holding our breath. I'm praying for complete healing on earth or for the Lord to return. I'm waiting for the day when we have a normal Friday night together, maybe going on a date or watching a movie together. And I'm waiting for the day in heaven when Ian will receive all that he's waiting for.

Until then, we press onward, asking for more and more grace.

"Preserve me, o God, for in you I take refuge."
Psalm 16

Larissa

Theraband

Bill, one of the people caring for Ian, brought in a theraband to try out with Ian. It looks like a giant rubber band. Ian did really well with it. He was stretching his arms and then bringing them back to chest again over and over. Ian really worked with it.

Thanks for your prayers.

Steve

"I waited patiently for the Lord;
he inclined to me and heard my cry."
Psalm 40:1




Today is my brother David's birthday. I have the same prayer request this day as we did last year-
That he could celebrate with Ian, his best friend.

Please pray with me that David could have what he most wants for his birthday - his best friend back.
And continue to pray in faith for Ian's soul to be encouraged and his complete healing.

-Beth


"Ask, and it will be given to you;
seek, and you will find;
knock, and it will be opened to you.
For everyone who asks receives,
and the one who seeks finds,
and to the one who knocks it will be opened."
Matthew 7:7-8

"For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
the Lord bestows favor and honor.
No good thing does he withhold
from those who walk uprightly."
Psalm 84:11

"Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him;
...those who wait for the Lord shall inherit the land."
Psalm 37:7,9

"This also comes from the Lord of hosts;
he is wonderful in counsel
and excellent in wisdom."
Isaiah 28:29

Pray for Ian

Here is a summary of the things we've been praying for Ian:

* That he would be motivated to communicate consistently with us.
* More specifically, that he would be able to use his voice and words to communicate.
* That he would make significant progress with both speech and physical/occupational therapy.
* For the success of this new outpatient strategy.
* For the healing of his body.

Thank you for standing with us.

Steve

P.S. I'll be fasting tomorrow if anyone wants to join with me -Larissa

"Surely he has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows."
Isaiah 53:4


Christ carried our griefs and sorrows when he hung on the cross. He hung there for my sins. My wicked heart, that so often gives in to the hourly temptations brought by this trial, is seen as righteous. I am clothed in righteousness because of Jesus' blood and that is what God considers. In light of eternity and what was accomplished at the cross, this trial is so small. These daily situations that tempt me to sin are so insignificant in comparison to the cross. I am sickly aware of my suffering, but I desperately need the Lord to make me aware of my salvation.


Lord, help us to see the cross before all other wayward thoughts.


Ian's throat seems to be feeling better. He has asked to have real food today and yesterday. Thank you, Lord, for answered prayer.


Please keep praying for Ian. Pray that he would be encouraged and that he would want to come back to us.

Larissa

Changing strategy

At the recommendation of Ian's doctor, we're changing our approach to helping Ian. Up to this point, we've had therapists and nurses coming into our home. Believing he's fallen into something of a boring routine, we're going to stop doing things that way and send him to outpatient therapy at the hospital beginning this week. We're hoping the change of scenery, the scheduled trips, and the available equipment at the hospital will help him regain some motivation. Ian's friends, Amanda and Heather (God bless them!), will continue to visit (hopefully!) to supplement the work of the hospital.

So, we say goodbye to those who have been visiting and helping Ian in our home. If you're one of those who have helped him, we want to thank you for all of your help. We hope this new chapter will provide some fresh stories of progress for Ian.

Please pray for grace from God for Ian to continue to work hard. Pray for the success of this new strategy. Pray for wisdom for us as we walk through this. Pray for Ian.

Steve

Ian had a rather uneventful day. No therapy sessions. We went out for a little bit tonight and then he spent some time sitting up. He's getting much stronger and better at sitting on his own.

To echo what Steve wrote a few posts ago, our hope should not be in any progress that Ian makes. We shouldn't have more faith on Ian's "good days" than we do on the bad. We have no idea if he will ever progress further than where he is now. All we have is the Lord.

"the Lord is my chosen portion and my cup"

Larissa

Faith is about focus

There are a lot of ideas out there about faith, but so many of the ideas aren't helpful. So many ideas only obscure my view of God. The eyes of my faith can't focus on the object of my immediate desire which in this case would be for Ian to be healed. No amount of verbal or mental claims for his healing will actually bring Ian back. I also can't focus on how much faith I have for that desired outcome, carefully adjusting my wording or my thought life to get the right formula. If Ian's return is dependent on how much "faith" I can muster (I have to be honest), we'll never see his return. My focus must remain on the only One who is almighty, who can do whatever he desires, yet who is kind and merciful and all-wise.

~~~~~

Lord, help me to keep my eyes fixed on you. Let me rest in your wise care and strong arms. Life is hard, but our days are in your hands. One day this will all be over, and we'll eat and have fellowship with you for eternity. The meal is ready. I can't wait.

~~~~~

Ian is struggling, it seems. I'm not sure why. Please pray for encouragement and motivation. Thank you for standing with us.

~~~~~

Steve

Prayers for Fasting

Specific Prayers for Fasting on Wednesday:

That Ian would be encouraged and motivated to keep working hard. We know that he can do the majority of the things that we ask him to do, he just needs to want to do it. Pray that God would continue to give him the desire to work to come back to us. God has obviously given Him much grace and much encouragement, or else Ian would've given up a long time ago. Pray that Ian continues to receive that grace and encouragement.

Thank you, as always....

Larissa